Kids
In our new normal, dough is the new sign of wealth. Not the green kind, but the bread kind we need to feed our families—and right now, it’s especially precious and scarce. So imagine my horror a few days ago to open my bread drawer and find a gaping hole in the bag...
Every year I like to think of a slogan to encapsulate my vision for the next 365 days. Last year was ‘Living the dream in 2019.’ Before that, I was ‘Starting off clean in 2018.’ And I can't forget this nugget of poetic wordsmithing: ‘Everything’s great in 2008.’ But...
In my household, we take our holidays pretty seriously. For Halloween, we creep out the lawn with life size monsters, a graveyard and a kids playhouse we converted into a haunted house. There’s even scary music blaring from the porch speakers that makes toddlers...
I was not the star kid on my soccer team. Shocker, I know, considering the size of my thighs (Schwarzenegger-ish) and the way I strut around like Team Captain, doling out nonstop direction: “Pass the ball! Take the shot! Put your dish in the dishwasher!” Still, once a...
Around here, Mom gets a bum rap. Dad is the fun one, doing all the tickling and wrestling and ball-throwing in the house. I’m that shadow in the background sweeping up the shards of the vase they just knocked over. I even call my husband ‘Daddy Funtime,’ sneering as I...
We’ve nicknamed my daughter “Ms. More” because, since the day she was born, she's always angled to get more than she has. If I agree to let her have one cookie, she immediately wants two. Before I’m even done reading her a bedtime story, she’s already asking for...
Whenever an old high school chum sends me a friend request, I run to her Facebook page to see what she looks like now, and (fine, I can admit this), how I look in comparison. Has she also traded in her Sun-In for Gray Away? Would I still recognize her without her...
There is some kind of Newtonian law that the more a kid sucks at a sport, the more vocal his parents are on the sidelines. Often, this coincides with Galileo’s hypothesis that these are precisely the same parents who are “experts” at the game being conducted, though...
Because I am such a big deal (insert laughing noises here) the folks at FTD sent me a list of creative ways to show mom gratitude on Mother's Day, thinking I may want to share it with you, my lovely readers. And, really, it was so sweet of them, because now I get to...
Yesterday I was sitting in the dentist chair, mouth splayed open like a crime scene, with that spit-slurping wand sucking up all my dignity as the overzealous hygienist told me I needed to floss better. And as she showed me exactly how to jam that unholy wax string up...