What doesn’t kill you makes a funny story.
I write to inspire, amuse and say what everyone is thinking.
My stories have been featured in Magnolia Journal, on Scary Mommy, HuffPost & Medium, and widely shared across the interwebs.
The ‘That Won’t Be Us” Illusion
We're so busy, we don't know whether we're coming or going.My older brother called the other day to invite us to a little get-together for his son’s birthday. When he gave me the date, I checked my calendar then started laughing like a teen snorting cough meds. “Bro,...
Angelina Jolie and the Power of Knowledge
Did you ever experience that weird sensation where you learn something you never knew, then suddenly you start seeing it everywhere? Quite recently, my something was the BRCA gene, and today’s news flurry over Angelina Jolie’s Op-Ed piece was the tipping point. In...
What the PARCC Taught Me
The End of Days is upon us. The Rapture. Judgment Day. Also known as PARCC testing time. If you have children of school age anywhere around these parts, you know this WTF-of-a-standardized-computer-based-test is all anyone has been talking about this whole school...
Do What You Love
At long last, the cover art for my first novel.Originally, the title for this post was going to be ‘The Wai-ai-ting Is The Hardest Part.’ A subtle nod to one of my first rock loves, the poet god of telling it like it is, Tom Petty. Then I thought maybe I’d be...
Brain Freeze
Heard you have cold weather coming your way?’ my mother said from the other end of a phone that was overlooking a Florida beach on a 74 degree day. (Granted, it has been “cold” where she is too, cold for this time of year, and the nights do dip down into the 50’s,...
Elfin’ Magic
I was nestled all snug in my bed again last night, about to drift off to much-needed sleep, when it hit me: Oh, sh–! I forgot to move the elf. Covers off. Slippers on. Back downstairs to reluctantly make merry mischief. Many of you have been there. Every one of you...
Bloody But Unbowed
I did something kind of crazy today. Bordering on suicidal. I went and played soccer for my women's pick-up league, in spite of the baseball sized hematoma covering my right shin and foot. For those of you not familiar with the sport, soccer is a game that requires...
Mom’s Out of Order
You know it's going to be a bad day when a nagging injury wakes you at 4 a.m. and you limp into the kitchen for an ice pack only to find water dripping down the freezer's shelves and all the ice cubes clumping together like kitty litter. But I did what any normal,...
When Did Halloween Become the New Christmas?
Some years, Halloween falls on a weekend so all the little ghouls get to start trick-or-treating at noon. But this year, October 31st falls on a Friday and my kids are bummed that they have to go to school. Roo and the Duke actually asked if they can stay home that...
My First Lockdown. Holy $H–!
So there I was at my son's parent-teacher conference this Wednesday, two minutes into hearing how superawesomeamazeball the Duke is doing. I was feeling good and gooey with pride since, clearly, I'm the tree the apple didn't fall far from. And that's when the...
Worse Parents Than You
Right as this school year was getting underway, I came across a news story about a mother who showed up to school pick-up insanely drunk. And instead of feeling bad for her child or sympathethic towards the woman's troubles, my first thought was, "Wow, next to her, I...
First Day Back! Yippee! (Sniffle Sniffle)
Third Grade Here We Come!All the social media sites are abuzz with posts and pics about the first day of school. Shots of boys and girls in their spiffy new clothes and shiny smiles, accompanied by shouts of Hooray! and Yippee! and #firstdayofkindergarten or...
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